MEN'S BUSINESS

FAQs

DOES MEN'S BUSINESS OFFER ACCREDITATION OR CERTIFICATION TO MENTORS?
No.

This website is an unrestricted, on-line platform intended to encourage men to become mentors. We offer basic context and ideas for how to do it, and resources to have engaging useful conversations. Mentors meeting in local mentor communities will receive encouragement, ideas and informal guidance from others. 

Men's Business does not in any way, however, vet, certify, qualify or offer accreditation to anyone calling themselves a mentor. We do not monitor mentors' performance or skills over time.

Men's Business accepts no liability or responsibility for any upset, distress or damage, emotional or otherwise, caused by a mentor in the course of a mentoring relationship. It is up to the mentee to select an appropriate mentor.

Please see our Disclaimer.

WHAT DOES MEN'S BUSINESS DO?
Men's Business enables volunteer men-tors to leverage their own wisdom and life experience by offering:
  • Skills training available in Be a Better Men-tor
  • On-going support from useful articles, podcasts and videos 
  • The opportunity to dip into a deep pool of wisdom offered by the Men-tor Community 
  • Guidelines to maintain a safe, respectful relationship with mentees, with clear boundaries and feedback mechanisms ​
WHY DOES MEN'S BUSINESS NOT INCLUDE WOMEN OR YOUNG PEOPLE?
Women are just as much in need of mentoring support and training as men. Men's Business focuses only on men, however, because:
  1. Many, many women are encouraging us to do so - they tell us their men need it
  2. Men flourish when they feel known, heard and encouraged by other men
  3. We have a lot of collective experience working with men
  4. Focus allows us to target our resources more effectively and make more of an impact

We have also decided to leave mentoring of young people to experts in the field with appropriate systems and controls to protect vulnerable kids.
DO I QUALIFY TO BE A MENTOR?
You may already be mentoring others without knowing it! Look around at work or in your community. Who follows you? Who listens to you?

Being a mentor is not dependent on age, success, status, income, education, power, influence, image, having enough free time or feeling positive.  

Being a mentor depends on three things:
  1. You are called to do it
  2. Other men want to follow you
  3. You are willing to learn, grow and develop yourself
 
“A mentor has a mature sense of himself… an inner authority that gives confidence to others… He possesses a certain ‘magnanimity’ of soul—a generosity of heart that makes others know they will not be abandoned.  Basically, they must have the care and the capacity for simple friendship, not domination or merely supervision.” ​  Richard Rohr
WHAT ARE THE CHARACTERISTICS OF A MENTOR?
Mentors are mature men who want to give back to others. They know failure can often teach more than success. They are elders (and not necessarily old), free from bitterness, able to laugh at themselves and love others without judgement.

The essential characteristics of a good mentor are the:
    •    heart to make a difference
    •    patience to listen
    •    desire to learn, grow and develop
    •    vulnerability to be themselves
    •    willingness be accountable
    •    desire to share your life experience
    •    belief in others
    •    passion to serve
WHAT ARE THE SKILLS REQUIRED TO BE A GOOD MENTOR?
The most important skills for a mentor are
  • Listening keenly (because we’ve got two ears and one mouth!)
  • Accepting others where they are at without judgement 
  • Sharing your stories / being vulnerable
  • Asking good questions / not telling people what to do or problem solving 
WHAT ARE THE BENEFITS OF BEING A MENTOR?
Mentors joining the Men’s Business community benefit seven ways :
  1. Your life's journey finally makes sense. Nothing you've ever done has been wasted. All the strands come together.
  2. Making a difference in another man's life
  3. Being more mindful
  4. Acquiring better communication and engagement skills 
  5. Growing together with other men inside a purposeful community 
  6. Being yourself is all that's required
  7. Feeling more confident 
WHAT DOES GOOD MENTORING LOOK LIKE?
“A mentor is a person who provides advice, listens, encourages, inspires, takes an interest, shares time, gives attention, clarifies a direction, gives suggestions for action, questions, suggests alternatives, can be trusted, provides constructive criticism, opens doors, guides, supports, builds self-confidence, has attained a level of maturity and can empathise. A mentor creates the learning environment and helps build a relationship of trust … I think of mentors as our tribal elders... The best mentors are challengers, trusted advisers, role models, approachable counsellors, encouragers, nurturers, leaders, supporters, teachers, friends.” 
​McCarthy Mentoring


Men's Business' mentoring is not professional development or performance enhancement (although it could include these areas), but an apprenticeship for the whole of life based in relationship. 

A good mentor:
 
  • Accepts the mentee just as he is
  • Believes in him and is encouraging
  • Listens keenly
  • Asks good questions 
  • Offers stories from his own life at the right time
WHOM SHOULD I MENTOR?
We all have opportunities to influence people informally. Where are yours? Who follows you? Whom do you lead? How are you already mentoring people?

What situations have passed you by where could have got involved? Why did you learn?

The most suitable mentees are adult men already in your life but not part of your nuclear family, such as nephews, godsons, grandsons, cousins, stepsons, friends of your children, children of your friends, men you work with, neighbours, or members of a sports or community group you belong to.

​By subscribing to Men's Business, you can go to Be a Better Men-tor for ideas on approaching a mentee and setting the relationship up for success. 
What is the value of mentoring?
Being a part of our community of mentors has seven benefits :
  1. Your life's journey finally makes sense. Nothing you've ever done has been wasted. All the strands come together.
  2. You get to make a difference in another man's life
  3. You'll be more mindful
  4. You will acquire better communication and engagement skills 
  5. You have the opportunity to grow together with other men inside a purposeful community 
  6. Being yourself is all that's required
  7. You will feel more confident 
how do mentees benefit?
Think of the occasions in your life when a mature person voluntarily gave you their time, attention and expertise. And think about those times you’ve done the same for others. There may not have been easily definable results in terms of higher sales, more money or faster career progress but something changed in your or their life forever.
​
Mentors create an environment where men feel accepted just as they are, believed in, known and encouraged. They enable other men to become more self-aware and uncover their sense of purpose, helping build 
confidence about the future

​
Younger men in particular gain confidence by learning to make choices based in their values, operate from their strengths and follow their purpose.

Older men develop wisdom and perspective by learning from the disappointments of the second half of life, and grow to become the elders our society so desperately needs. 
WHAT ARE THE BARRIERS TO MENTORING MENTEES NEED TO OVERCOME?
For the mentee, barriers include:
  • Lack of context - no previous positive experience of helpful support from another man
  • Asking for help and admitting weakness
  • Fear of judgment, criticism or not being up to the task
  • Fear of being let down or disappointed
  • Suspicion of the mentor's motives 

Mentors can address these barriers by:
  • Getting over embarrassment and initial awkwardness - this is counter cultural!
  • Formally inviting another man into a mentoring relationship
  • Carefully explaining the context and motivation
  • Being patient and understanding with a mentee’s concerns
  • Demonstrating vulnerability on an on-going basis by sharing their own challenges, failures and personal stories
  • Humour and self-effacement
HOW DO I BECOME A BETTER MENTOR?
​Men's Business offers a number of ways to become a better mentor:
  • Skills training available in Be a Better Men-tor
  • On-going support from useful articles, podcasts and videos
  • The opportunity to dip into a deep pool of wisdom offered by the men-tor community 
  • Guidelines to maintain a safe, respectful relationship with men-tees, with clear boundaries and feedback mechanisms ,​
HOW DO I FIND A GOOD MENTOR? 
You're looking for a mentor but you cannot think of an obvious candidate. Or approaching the person you have in mind seems difficult. 

Go to our page 'Looking for a Mentor?' for more information.
DO MENTORS GET PAID?
No. Men's Business is a not-for-profit organisation and we expect men-tors in our communities to volunteer their time and refrain from charging mentees. 

In a professional or organisational context it is appropriate to charge the client  (see Other Options), however that is not the context in which Men's Business operates.

Please get in touch using the contact form below.

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