WHAT SHOULD you TALK ABOUT with your mentee IN THE FIRST SESSION?
Schedule two hours. Both bring a notebook, pen and glasses!
We recommend asking the mentee to tell his story. It builds rapport, and the mentee feels known.
We recommend asking the mentee to tell his story. It builds rapport, and the mentee feels known.
- Let it run for half an hour, or longer if he wants to keep talking
- If he stops, ask questions to dig deeper (see below for suggested questions)
- Get the names of important people in his life – family, friends, colleagues, mentors
- Listen for formative events
- Take notes
- Ask, “How was it telling your story?”
- Next ask him to talk about his ambitions, dreams, goals and hopes for his life
- Review basic agreements (see above)
- Agree time for next meeting and put it in your diaries
WHAT SHOULD you TALK ABOUT IN SUBSEQUENT SESSIONS?
Debrief and affirm your mentee:
- “Since our last session, what new and different things are you noticing?”
- “What are you learning?”
- “What have you accomplished?”
- "Where have you felt most 'in the flow'? When have you felt most 'out of the flow'?"
- “What do you want to talk about today?”
- Go with it. Ask questions, challenge, dig
- This could take the whole session
- “Where do you want to be in 6 months or a year? How would you like your life to be different?”
- “You identified some hopes, dreams and ambitions last time. Is there anything you’d like to do about them?”
- "Where are you making progress?"
- "Where are you stuck?"
- "What is working / not working?"
- Go with it. Ask questions.
questions to help you PROBE A LITTLE DEEPER
Sometimes it is useful to probe a little deeper to get to the heart of an issue. Here are some useful general questions:
- "Tell me more about that?"
- "What has you think that?"
- "Is there another way of looking at that issue?"
- "Is there more you have not told me yet?"
- "Keep talking"
- "What has worked about you in that situation and why?"
- "What has not worked about you in that situation and why?"
- "What should you start / stop / continue doing?"
- "What would you like to do about that?"
- "Is there anything else you could do?"
- "If anything was possible what would you do?"
- "Even though you can’t do anything about it, what would you do if you could?"
what to do when your mentee is blaming himself for something wrong
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